Pruning Time: When Growing Tomatoes is like Raising Children

Another Way for week of July 6, 2023

Pruning Time: When Growing Tomatoes is like Raising Children

I think my favorite job in our rather large garden is pruning and tying up tomato branches.

Even if you don’t do any gardening or raise tomatoes, stay tuned for the lessons pruning can teach us about life.

My parents basically had just bush tomatoes in our garden, that I recall, but my father-in-law here in Virginia was an amazing gardener. He taught me the art and need for pinching out suckers. If you look closely at tomato vines, there are little sprouts that come between the main tomato vine, and the stems which grow and bear tomatoes as the vine progresses. I know some gardeners may argue about the need for pruning but it depends on how you grow the tomatoes.

Bush tomatoes may not need this pruning but if you grow your tomatoes with stake supports or t-posts (metal fence posts found in farm stores), you can tie up the branches as they grow. Many varieties of tomatoes will then keep producing fruit until frost comes. So that is where pruning comes in. One website, Gardeners Supply, notes that if left unattended, “tomatoes will grow into shrubby, multi-stemmed plants that topple under the weight of their fruit.” That website also notes that allowing some suckers to flourish further up the plant can bring late season tomatoes.

But as I quietly work the rows, tying up stalks and pruning the suckers, it makes me think about life lessons on raising children. When children are just babies, we likely love everything about them except diapers or colic. As they grow into toddlers or grade school, we may try to weed out such habits as thumb sucking, temper tantrums, taking toys from siblings, bullying others at school, or worse. The teen years we try to help steer them to positive relationships and friends, and away from drugs, alcohol, smoking. Of course I am aware of negative pruning in families when children are mistreated and punished in severe ways.

But garden pruning as an adult reminds me to trim out bad habits or tendencies in my own life and personality. Am I jealous? Judgmental? Think of myself as better than others? Yes, yes and yes: I can slip into those habits or bad behaviors. 

As I work painstakingly to remove the little tomato suckers to help larger robust stems prosper and bear big fruit, the quietness of the garden helps me remember others in prayer, to breathe deeply of the fresh air (well, recently it’s been smoky), and helps me look out for tomato worms. Tearing up old t-shirts or sheets to make soft tie-ups for the branches occupies me on other mornings.

There was another thing that I was reminded of this summer during our fairly significant drought period. We had weeks without any measurable rain. The grass turned brown and crackly. I watered the tomatoes night after night for three weeks, using water from our well, or some rainwater storage tanks. My mind then went to so many people around the world suffering from long dry seasons, dealing with dust and walking miles for water or food. I thought of children with those extended bellies and the elderly with thin arms and legs. On the opposite end, were countries and communities which experienced too much rain and flooding. My heart and prayers go out to all who lament on either end. 

My Dad had a true heart for people suffering from food and water insecurity, as folks call it these days. He participated in two worldwide organizations (CROP and Heifer International) which attempted to bring food and livestock to communities and families in need—who were to turn around and raise the offspring of livestock to keep feeding the family in future years. I need to do a better job of sharing with others, like my Dad taught. Perhaps he’s still pruning me!

Speaking of food, be on the lookout for my next column sharing experiences from a dietitian who launched a cookbook which has helped millions eat healthier.

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Do you raise tomatoes? Do you like pruning?

How do you work at pruning bad habits or tendencies?

Tell us here or contact me at Another Way, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834, or email anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com.

Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of ten books, most recently Memoir of an Unimagined Career. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.