Writing or Recording Snippets of Family History

Another Way for week of November 10, 2023

Writing or Recording Snippets of Family History

[Please note: Ads on this blog have not been approved by me and I don’t earn anything from the ads.]

I’m getting older. Duh. We all are, even my darling baby granddaughter who is now scooting around on her hands and knees crawling, and pulling herself up at the gates her parents have lovingly installed in their townhouse to keep her safer.

And I’m using my Dad’s old cane when I walk around our seven acres with the dog to keep me safer. This is life. The cane always brings back precious memories.

I’m excited to share that one of the writing projects I’ve been working on this past year (when I haven’t been playing with grandkids or writing columns) is stories from my wonderful parents and their parents and grandparents. My siblings and I have spent time remembering and jotting down notes. Together we’re publishing a book we’re calling Cultivating Fields, Faith and Family: Mom and Dad’s Memorable Mennonite Life. It is now out and available on Amazon and I hope some of you will be interested enough to check it out. I also hope it may inspire some of you to write or pull together stories of your own.

A quote by writer Madeleine L‘Engle is part of my inspiration: “If you don’t recount your family history, it will be lost. Honor your own stories and tell them too. The tales may not seem very important, but they are what binds families together and makes each of us who we are.”

If you’re thinking, “I hate writing” or “not me, ever,” of course there are various ways to “recount your family history.” Today’s electronic tools make it relatively easy to interview family or friends on video or on your iPhone or other cell phone or iPad. Gathering such memories can give you opportunities to draw your family closer together and cherish the wild and crazy stories along with the sad, the heart wrenching, or difficult memories.

And you don’t have to share your family’s “dirty wash.” In fact, I urge you not to. We have plenty of stories in our family that we’re not sharing: the world doesn’t need to know. I encourage others to share the uplifting, fun, and inspiring times—and leave some things hiding in history. And of course, any sharing of family stories is not for everyone. My dental hygienist, whose daughters are nearing the age for marriage and babies, was asking about how I felt as a grandmother. Her own grandparents had been very mean and ugly to her and others in the family. She had no good example of grandparents as being loving or special to her. So sad.

My one sister had given my mother journaling books with specific prompts, and urged Mom to write things down for us as she grew older. We “promised” not to read them (other than a few fun glances) until after she died. (Mom died in October 2021 and Dad passed in March 2006.) Mom was a prolific letter writer and especially after her hearing (on phone) became so difficult, she enjoyed writing letters to all of us which also gave us a nice stash of memories to include in the book. Dad also wrote things occasionally, or I helped him write down a story or two so we include all six of us (Mom, Dad, and four siblings) as the “writers” for this volume.

Here’s one sample that opens the book: “Our grandmother, Ruth Stauffer, was afraid Mom’s shiny black curls would make Bertha proud or vain, so Ruth bristled and changed the topic whenever anyone praised Mom’s lovely curls. Mom also got on Grandma Ruth’s nerves with her chatter. “She even stuffed clean rags in my mouth to shut me up!” It sounds funny to us now but obviously was not appreciated by Mom.

Mother, in describing Ruth as she reflected on her relationship with her mother, wrote “I know I got on her nerves a lot with my chatter.”

A sweet memory Mom shared of her mother was that (our) Grandma Ruth would “surround us with her arms if and when it stormed hard.” Like Maria in Sound of Music!

Next week, I’ll share a longer story from the book.

***

Let us hear about a special family memory! Or a fun or funny experience.

***

As of yesterday, this new book is being sold on Amazon published through Kindle Direct Publishing—a do-it-yourself effort! You can purchase it here. Or if you prefer, write to me at Another Way, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834, or email anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com and I can mail you the book. The book is $18.99 plus shipping of $4, or $23 all together.

***

Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of ten books, most recently Memoir of an Unimagined Career. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.  

E