Be sure to enter our drawing for one free copy of Marian’s memoir! See directions below.
Another Way for week of October 11, 2019
A Gentler Time? Growing up Plain
I love biographies, autobiographies, and memoir—including the memories of ordinary citizens. When we read a memoir, don’t most of us look for epiphanies and connections that may be similar to our own lives or upbringing?
Marian Longenecker Beaman’s debut book, Mennonite Daughter: The Story of a Plain Girl takes the reader through early childhood events and memories—some of them funny and heartwarming and others that are painful: difficult to take and understand.
Early on I was drawn to Marian’s “Plain and Fancy” blog telling some of these stories. We have the same alma mater, Eastern Mennonite University, but she grew up as a very conservative and plain Mennonite in eastern Pennsylvania while I grew up in a less plain Mennonite community in Indiana a few years behind her. But I also frequently felt different than my peers, wearing dresses all through elementary school along with pigtails and no cut hair until I was about 12. We also both eventually married men who weren’t Mennonites and found new church homes where we practice an active faith.
Marian is a former college English professor, so her writing is crisp and descriptive, with careful and precise word choices that bring alive the action, color, and flavor of growing up a plain Mennonite in Lancaster County, Pa. She lived in an area and era where women especially were expected to dress and behave very conservatively, although she was not Amish or Old Order. Marian chafed under the restrictions and as the oldest child, somehow her father tended to make an example of her. Later as a beginning teacher in the conservative Lancaster Mennonite High School, before church rules began to change regarding dress, she also had scrapes with the school administration.
But her relationships with her mother, grandmother, and an aunt who never married seems to be the balm Marian needs to survive and thrive through her growing up difficulties. She portrays fun and hilarious experiences with her sisters, a brother, and cousins which balance the strain the restrictions put on her spirit in a mid-century Mennonite home. The children play bride and groom clomping about in the bright red shoes portrayed on her book’s cover. Her aunt actually experiments with taking home movies, to the delight of the children. Her exceedingly frugal father eventually buys Marian a beautiful violin—but without ever consulting Marian regarding whether she would enjoy taking violin lessons. She ends up loving to play, including in her public high school’s orchestra, but is confronted with a dilemma when she does not want to stick out like a plain girl when all the other girls have beautiful dresses to wear. Her mother comes to the rescue and sews a suitably “fancy” dress that fits within the confines of their church rules. Marian is elated to blend in with others on stage: a high moment in the memoir.
Marian started her “Plain and Fancy” blog about the same time I began mine, “Finding Harmony Blog.” We regularly exchange comments on each other’s posts and I truly hope we can meet in person someday. But meanwhile, observing that I was/am an editor and writer for a lot of years, she asked me (and others) to go over her memoir manuscript in an early “beta” stage as they say. I gave her feedback and now I am delighted to see that the memoir has earned great reviews on Amazon and Goodreads and other places, which helps many others know about an author’s work. Even an author who was once a plain little Mennonite girl, emotionally surviving what we sometimes want to call “a gentler time.” Some of the confrontations Marian went through were hardly gentle—painfully cruel and rough.
Mennonite Daughter comes to a satisfying conclusion as Marian matures into romance, career, and a faith community that fits her spirit and ambitions—free to be the person she wants to be with peace about her past. And the teacher in her still enjoys loving and guiding precious two-year-olds at her church. I feel that many Another Way readers would enjoy this well written and historical glance into a plain culture many wonder about.
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Is there anything I’ve written about Marian’s book that especially resonates with you? Marian and I both would love to hear!
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You can enter a drawing for a free copy of Mennonite Daughter (deadline Oct. 25) by commenting here on my blog. You can even just say something like “I want to win Marian’s book.” Or, you can send a comment to me at anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834, to be entered in the drawing.
Deadline: I will draw the winner’s name on October 25 at 12 noon, so be sure to send your name or comment as soon as possible! Winner will be announced here and on my Facebook page: melodie.m.davis. I will contact the winner to get her/his mailing address.
You can also visit Marian’s blog for more info on this book: https://marianbeaman.com/.
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Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of October 4, 2019
To Save a Life
Two bare-chested male mannequin halves were laying ready on the table as we walked into the training room. An assortment of first aid supplies and gloves were on the tables, for each of us five “students.” Suddenly I pondered the wisdom of signing up for this class. Could I ever perform CPR on someone who desperately needed it? What had we gotten ourselves into?
My husband and I recently learned various first aid skills in an American Heart Association course, taught by a friend from our Lions Club, Fred Shobe. Fred is the safety director for a local large company, Trumbo Electric. We spent six hours learning cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR), using an Automated External Defibrillator (AED), and responding to other emergencies such as choking, low blood sugar, bee stings, snake bites, tick bites, applying a tourniquet, delivering a shot with an “Eppy” autoinjector, and more.
I’m not going to try to repeat the training here, that would be impossible and not advisable. But I’ll share highlights.
There are numerous ways anyone can be helpful at the scene of an accident or after an apparent heart attack, cardiac arrest (two different things), stroke, fainting, seizure, and more. Some of our drills included learning and then practicing these basic steps:
1. Take a few seconds to quickly assess the scene, making sure it is safe so that no one else gets hurt. This could be shutting off a mower or weed eater, moving objects out of the way, etc. and having people stand back to give you and the victim room.
2. Figure out if the person is breathing/responsive: Tap on his chest and say, “Are you ok?” If there is no answer, yell for help, or if someone is there with you, have them call 9-1-1. Also send them to find a First Aid kit, and an AED if available.
3. Try to assess if the person has stopped breathing or is only gasping. If no one steps up, call 9-1-1 yourself and put your phone on speaker so you can talk to a dispatcher without the phone in hand. A dispatcher is trained to talk you through basic CPR until more advanced emergency personnel arrive. Never hang up from the dispatcher until they tell you to do so. It helps to always be aware of the address or area you’re at, to provide as complete a description of your location as possible. Someone else can go meet the EMS (Emergency Medical Services) and direct them to your side.
4. If the person is not breathing, start CPR (30 compressions and 2 breaths per set if you know how). Continue doing this until either an AED is provided, or EMS arrives. An AED attempts to shock a heart back into its normal rhythm. Once an AED arrives, turn it on. It will talk you through the proper steps of using it. You will need to remove or cut open the patient’s shirt or top for the shock pads to be stuck to the chest.
5. Or, if the person is breathing normally when you first check their breathing, then look for blood from an injury, possible broken bones, and medical jewelry or medical tattoo. The person may be diabetic and lost consciousness from low blood sugar. Stay with the person until EMS arrives, and if bleeding, use first aid to stop the bleeding. Let the EMS take over once they arrive.
As the only woman in our training group, I started to worry about the instructions to remove or cut open the person’s shirt or top in an actual emergency. Did that mean women too? Of course. Our instructor added that you may need to cut open the front of a bra especially if the bra has an underwire. (The wire’s conductivity could mess with the electric shock of the AED.) He added that if there are bystanders or others helping with the rescue attempt, they could assist by holding up blankets, towels, or sweaters to help give a female patient some privacy. Obviously, medical emergencies are not a time to worry about baring all.
I appreciated all we learned. Just knowing what is involved is helpful; how to assist someone giving CPR or other first aid can also be lifesaving. Just a little over a year ago, my great-nephew collapsed on the high school football field. The person administering CPR had just had a refresher course, and the quick action of all involved—including those who helicoptered him to a nearby university hospital, were credited with his recovery. His family was so very grateful to God and the staff who stepped up. Fred emphasized that every minute that passes for a person who needs CPR and is not receiving it, their rate of survival diminishes.
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For one resource, check this video on YouTube: CPR/AED Emergency Response Refresher.
I invite you to share your emergency story by commenting here, or sending to anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of September 27, 2019
Learning with Children with Autism
Mr. Scott Showalter on an unbearably hot day when the air conditioning was off, but determined to dress up for the “Lion King” theme!
Mr. Showalter holds the 20 or so daycampers of Camp Jigsaw spellbound as he chats with the puppet on his one hand, doing a pretty fair ventriloquist imitation. The love and skill he has for interacting with children who sometimes just can’t handle sitting still or being quiet or waiting for their turn, flows from him and over the room.
One of the highlights of our summer was volunteering two weeks (my husband) and one week (me) to help with a half-day camp for children at various places on the autism spectrum. Neither of us are professional educators or had any experience with children with autism although we’ve known some families with specific issues.
The camp was for children kindergarten through grade 5, and organized because kids with autism issues often feel like they don’t fit into a traditional summer day or overnight camp. So they miss out on the fun of other kids. This camp was held at a local elementary school.
We had a lot of good old-fashioned fun, becoming kids again ourselves. There was gigantic bubble blowing, water fights, magic shows, time with a therapy dog and trainer, Kung Fu artist giving lessons, daily snack time, yoga, water balloon baseball, old fashioned storyteller, bowling, roller skating (many children for the very first time), a jump park and large local water park, making music, rock painting, dunk tank, relay races, balloon animals, cooperative games, and playing Twister on a mat covered with shaving cream. The program for this camp is free for families; volunteers, organizers, civic clubs and churches raised funds and donated snacks and other supplies. Some invited speakers and performers donated their time.
We found ourselves not only enjoying the activities with the children, but that interacting with them and the other adults was eye-opening, educational, and a “Mister Rogers” review of things like being kind. Having good manners. Saying please and thank you more often. Since children on the autism spectrum are frequently frustrated by issues which keep them from being like their classmates and friends, learning ways to de-stress or cool off was another learning.
If we “caught” a child being kind or doing something nice for someone else, we rewarded them with a small plastic gem, and each day there were total goals set for the gems children accumulated. If the group of children reached the number set for that day, they each received a simple take home prize—such as cheapo plastic sunglasses, binoculars, safari hats. If you are thinking: rewards—what a gimmicky way to get children to behave and cooperate! The counselors remind us: don’t you (or didn’t you—for those retired) also work for the reward of a paycheck? Yep.
My husband signed up first after our friend Joe had experienced an awesome two weeks last summer with the inaugural camp—he called it life changing. It was a great success for children, parents, teachers, and schools. This camp was for kids from four elementary schools in our area and we’d love to see other areas follow suit. The founder and spark plugs behind the day camp include Scott Showalter mentioned above, with pre-kindergarten teacher Holly Blais, (who first worked at a camp for children with autism in Pennsylvania), and Jill Rice, speech pathologist. Each camper had an adult volunteer alongside, plus numerous middle and high school mentors who participated in the fun.
Scott would open each morning’s activities with a motivational speech setting out some goals for the children, such as being a participator, communicating with others, staying in the activity space, and being polite. One morning as he huddled with us as volunteers and leaders before campers arrived, he shared how he and his wife have a dog Bella “whose daily life consists mainly of being in the house, in the back yard, or occasional walks or trips. But every morning she can’t wait to start a new day. She jumps on our bed and wiggles all over to wake us up, just as excited as she was the previous day.” The Showalters find her exuberance exciting—even if they’d sometimes appreciate sleeping a little longer.
Showalter encouraged us to face our new day with the daycampers with the enthusiasm of a lively dog. This advice was very apt, as some volunteers had to deal with outbursts or meltdowns of children.
Ready for a new day? Bring it on with the energy and eagerness of a young dog. And remember your manners, even when your day doesn’t go as hoped. There are lessons to be learned!
Perhaps the best way to get a feel for what we experienced is to simply share these photos, mostly shared by Sydney Coffman and Ruth Breeden Sonifrank.
For a free booklet, “Dealing with Autism as a Family,” email me at anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of September 20, 2019
Discovering More than Gold in Alaska – Part 2
The eerie landscape of Denali National Park, many streams of sediment flowing from the melts.
The fog and mist linger much of the day, lacing the trees and mountains in an ethereal, otherworldly haze. Later in the day, it rains off and on, making the chance we’d see the peak named Denali—highest on the North American continent—nil to nothing.
Some of many white caps we saw, especially in Glacier Bay.
The weather overall was so rainy that even though we should have seen Denali (the native word means “the high one”) as we traveled into the Denali Park Preserve by bus (the only way you’re allowed to travel deep into the park), we didn’t. I was disappointed but not crushed, knowing it would have been somewhat rare–only about 20-30 percent of visitors end up seeing Denali. We saw many other beautiful mountains.
The six travelers sitting down for a formal dinner.
How do you capsulize 12 days of amazing travel? Do you tell about the gorgeous, exciting and educational aspects, or do you reveal the things that went wrong (leaving your little bag with your passport on a souvenir store counter)? If you missed last week’s column, my husband and I were delighted to finally travel to Alaska with some of his family. Most of our group have had various serious medical issues these last few years, but none had unsurmountable problems on our trip, thank God.
My biggest surprise: gorgeous flowers everywhere in Anchorage and elsewhere, gift of summertime’s very long days and rays.
We spent our first six days on land, visiting natural attractions beginning at Fairbanks near the Arctic Circle, and eventually took a sightseeing train to Anchorage on the Gulf of Alaska.
Trumpeter swan. Author and NPR reporter Heather Lende says they sound like a middle school student learning to play trumpet. I can hear that!
Overall the scenery in Alaska was stunning, powerfully bringing to mind the creation of the world. It was an intriguingly sparse landscape—often covered with gray sediment from water washing over rocks and eroding river banks. Only six types of trees grow in Denali Park and much of the interior of Alaska. Permafrost keeps the ground too hard for some tree roots to edge down deeper. We saw white and black spruce, quaking aspen, paper birch, larch, and balsam poplar. My biggest surprise was seeing some of the largest flower blossoms I’ve ever seen, on the streets of Anchorage and other ports: they grow huge because of long summer days. Also a nice surprise: very kind and helpful locals in Anchorage when one of our travelers took a spill on a city street.
Our grizzly in the wild, seen from busy windows.
Highlights were watching a black grizzly for a good ten minutes (safely from our converted school bus, and as quiet as 35 excited passengers can get) as he munched on leaves and crossed a stream; we also saw caribou, moose, eagles, a trumpeter swan.
Caribou with fuzzy antlers.
By mid-August the creatures were instinctively preparing for the coming winter. Speaking of winter, we were told it is almost unheard of for schools to ever close for snow! (Take that, Virginia, where we close schools sometimes before snow even starts. Yes, our hills and curvy roads can be treacherous of course.)
David Monson at his rainy home with sled dogs.
I also was intrigued watching the joy and exuberance on the faces of Iditarod sled dogs who were unhooked from their dog houses to pull an ATV beside our river excursion boat. The dogs adore running fast and being part of the pack. This was at the home of the late musher Susan Butcher, who died of cancer in 2006. Her husband, David Monson, explained the training process to us, assisted by his daughters. Susan was the second woman to win the Iditarod in 1986 and then won four out of five sequential years.
Grandma had to buy autographed books for her grandsons, telling the story of Granite, the amazing and beloved dog of Susan Butcher. Signed by her husband, David Monson.
Here’s the gold Stuart and I were able to glean from our panning! They gave us old film containers to store our treasure.
Last week I mentioned panning for real gold. What seemed like such a touristy thing to do turned out to be challenging and educational—learning how the dredging worked and how much gold and oil have helped the economy of the state. But panning was tricky: shaking the pan and rinsing the sand with water until only some gold flecks (tiny nuggets) remained. My husband scored about $25 worth all together.
Finally we boarded our cruise ship in Seward, Alaska, and followed the coast the next five days to four other ports—a great relaxing way to spend the second week. No packing and unpacking and moving every one or two nights, and no cooking or even making our beds.
Margerie Glacier was sobering to watch as ice constantly fell off into Glacier Bay.
Closer shot of Margerie Glacier.
In Glacier Bay, we watching solemnly as glaciers “calved” or broke up, lingering near Margerie Glacier. Someone who’d been there five years ago said the glacier had shrunk dramatically since he was there.
Only in recent days have I grasped how glad I was to share this trip with my in-laws. Sitting down to our reserved table in the ship’s gala dining room each evening, there was never a lack of conversation. Do you agree that family bonds—even though we don’t always agree—are the real gold?
Every day, the ship’s elevators told us what day it was. Probably the most common topic of conversation in the elevators. 🙂
My favorite “take homes” — tiny origami art made by our sommelier: do you see a puppy, butterfly, lobster and why not: lady slippers?
Our favorite town, Haines, Alaska. Flowers all along the gangplank from the ship to the village. Since returning, I discovered a marvelous writer/blogger from Haines: Heather Lende. https://heatherlende.com/blog/
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See a bit of the school bus tour at Denali National Park, very similar to the one we took: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcwWnig7mcw. Or watch a clip from the same Gold Dredge #8 we visited: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5gWl4BX4Nw
What’s on your bucket list?
Send your own adventure stories, questions, or comments to anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or write to Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
This was not OUR ship, but another seemingly sailing straight towards us. Obviously, he took a turn.
Another Way for week of September 13, 2019
We Found Gold – Part 1
After serious saving and waiting approximately five years, my husband and I were finally able to visit Alaska in August.
The Christmas of 2015 we told our kids not to give us gifts for Christmas but maybe give money towards an Alaska trip. The yen to go far north started for my husband a number of years ago when his father visited Alaska with his second wife who had relatives there (his first wife died in 1973). So we longed for the opportunity to also explore America’s “last frontier.”
Flag of our 49th state, at a real gold mine, Gold Dredge #8.
Alaska has a limited season for warmish tourist travel, (the prime time is really just mid-June to mid-September at latest), so that’s not a big window working around family schedules and priorities. We planned to travel with Stuart’s brothers, our sister-in-law, and a friend, so meshing all our family birthdays, events, and medical issues meant wondering “will we ever be able to pull this off”?
For one thing, Stuart and I wanted to wait until we retired so we wouldn’t burn two weeks of vacation days on one trip; then our middle daughter was expecting her second child the middle of one summer; then my brother-in-law’s youngest daughter was planning an early September wedding—not a good summer for parents of the bride to go on a big trip; finally last September our oldest daughter was expecting a third baby, and we needed and wanted to be around in case the baby came early. Plus the other grandma had already booked an Alaska trip last September and likely would not be around to help with the baby and older sons, and one of Stuart’s brothers was also scheduled for major surgery. So all that meant we waited. I doubt we’re alone with these kinds of issues at our ages.
We spent many hours together over the winter planning for the trip with my brother-in-law here, and my sister-in-law. Here they’re not trip planning but Barbara was figuring out if she would ever enjoy doing Sudoku puzzles like Nolan. The answer? (What do you see on her face?)
But this summer we finally got “our” turn, and as we began planning in January there were many worries about “what if this or that happens” filling our darker hours wondering if the long anticipated trip would actually come true. There were particular health concerns among our party of six so trip insurance was an absolute must. All of us held our breath as the summer edged closer to departure. I watched my steps very carefully: no falls please!
On the morning of August 12, I pinched myself to feel it was real. I thought back to the western camping trip my parents promised us when we were kids, which we began planning in 1959. They said, (wisely in retrospect), “We’ll all save up our money and when Nancy graduates from high school in 1964, we’ll go out west for about six weeks.” We were immediately excited and ready to go, but all four kids groaned that five years was way too long to wait and that we’d be “too old.” By trip time, we ranged in age from nine to 17: smart parents to plan such a trip that we would all be able to remember. So we were old enough to not pinch each other and fight on long miles in the back seat.
Glacier Bay, with some of the best weather we experienced.
My parents gave us the gift of visiting many states and national parks, and a treasury of family bonds and memories. While my parents knew it was important to be old enough, for this Alaska trip we travelers knew at ages 65-71, it was important to go now, before we got TOO old.
Speaking of long miles, fast forward to 2019 as our group of six flew from Washington D.C. to
A bush pilot illustrating landing on a river: a necessity for getting around in Alaska for those who live in certain areas. No, we did not ride one of these to Alaska!
Denver, and then on to Fairbanks, Alaska. The flight from Denver to Fairbanks was over five and a half hours and none of us purchased extra legroom (not even the six-foot-four guy wearing a huge leg boot). I was ready to pinch my husband at times to move his arm over, but finally adjusted to a posture where my shoulder got its space too.
Next time, I’ll share some of the high spots, low moments, and biggest learnings of this particular trip. And how we found gold, both the literal and the sentimental kind. I think we appreciate things more we have to work hard for and wait on, agree?
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I’d love to hear about a trip you were delighted to take. Or you memories of a childhood trip to which you looked forward. Or perhaps one you’re planning now!
Share here! Or send comments or questions to me at anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or write to Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
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Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of August 30, 2919
Whitewater Moments, Inspired by a Photo
With summer winding down very quickly now, I hope you are as full of special and even magical summer moments as I am.
Photo of a photo: from l to r: Stuart; nephew Jamie; sis-in-law Debbe; brother Terry, in front, red hat; nephew Jeremy; yours truly; sister Pert; in back ex-bro-in-law–still a family friend–Stan and navigator for the day.
When I was at my mother’s retirement apartment this July, an old photo brought back a very special moment and trip when our extended family (my siblings, parents, and grandchildren) went on our very first whitewater rafting trip, circa 1990. We ventured out on the pretty rambunctious Nantahala River in the Great Smoky Mountains of North Carolina. I would say enjoyed, but not everyone experienced the fast-moving river equally!
First of all, my parents weren’t up to it—just like now I don’t think my husband and I are quite up to it anymore. Also, the children under the age of eight were not allowed on that level of rapids, so Grandpa and Grandma took them on some other touristy outings nearby. Over the years, many us were thrilled to navigate four different U.S. rivers with various groupings of family members.
That first trip, we were all quite green except maybe my then-brother-in-law who apparently looked strong and river-wise enough to be appointed as navigation guide on our particular raft.
In the photo, all of our faces tell stories. I stared at Mom’s photo for quite a while, taken professionally by the rafting company. It brings back a flood of emotions from the trip, and memories of family. Those photos always cost an arm and a leg of course, but they mean so much later.
In the picture, I’m sitting near the front of the raft, oar in hand but leaning back as we were told to do when riding a large rapid. My mouth is wide open: not in horror or fear, but in glee for the adrenaline rush and amazement that we were in real whitewater. One sister is right behind me, and while she looks happy and excited, she looks a bit calmer—I think she had done river rafting before—certainly had many more outdoor adventurous trips than I. My youngest brother and my husband were at the very front of the raft, and their faces reflect more serious caution, perhaps because as fathers and husbands, they were feeling the weight of what we had gotten ourselves into. Would we all come out ok? Not hurt? All alive? Those thoughts passed through all of our minds at times, I know, except maybe the two children in the middle of the raft. Another raft held other cousins and another sister and her husband.
My two nephews—my brother’s only sons—have pure happiness on their faces; they did not need to help do the heavy lifting of rowing the raft (the older one may have held an oar, but he didn’t have the strength his dad or uncles had). His younger brother and the youngest on the raft, about age nine, is totally protected in the middle of the boat and just along for the fun—reflected on his face. Back of him is his mother—my sister-in-law, whose face speaks volumes. She told us later she was praying the whole time, “Dear-God-if-you-get-us-out-of-this-I-will-never-try-this-again.” She was a great sport. My brother-in-law at the very rear also had quite a serious look, reflecting probably the weight of his responsibility to help us steer the craft safely through the waters.
We did make it securely off the river although in the years to come, had some close scrapes where some of us slipped out of a raft and downriver, but safely recovered and climbed back in. I must add that in retrospect, and knowing a young man who did die rafting a Colorado river, I am ever more grateful for the safety we experienced as we rowed in God’s amazing and awe-inspiring world. God imagined and created an outdoor world that beckons and begs us to love and care for it, recognizing not only the majesty of nature, but the mind and Being behind it all.
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Have you had any white knuckle moments—whether on whitewater or not?
Share your stories here, we’d love to hear. 🙂
Or send comments to anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of August 23, 2019
Howling Monkeys: Adventures in Central America
Guest Columnist Merle Headings
Editor’s Note: Second of two parts by Merle Headings, a pilot who made flying mission trips to Central America for Christian organizations in the late 70s and early 80s. Read Part 1 here.
The village of Sayaxche Petén on the Pasion River was our destination for this mission. Sayaxche had a small 3,000 foot jungle grass runway, a little hard to find in the middle of the jungle. There were no signs of an air strip, no control tower or pavement, not even a windsock or runway lights.
Since I had landed there a number of times, I knew what to look for. I lined up with the south end of the air strip and made a pass at about 50 feet above the ground (this is what we called sweeping the runway, to let the residents know to get animals off the air strip so we could land). It was after four p.m., and time, daylight, and energy were running out. People came to the grassy runway to see who had come to their town.
We had certainly landed in another world. To keep the plane safe, Brother Melvin High arranged for two boys to sleep under the plane wing at night for the next 12 days for a few dollars. Then he hired a truck taxi to take us to the river, and a canoe for the four hour river trip to the missionary clinic. By 5 p.m., we loaded every precious item into a large, wooden canoe. They gave us instructions in Spanish to hold still and not move around—which we had no problem understanding. The pitifully humming boat motor was steered by our native canoe captain. Would this worn canoe and motor make the trip?
Carmen and Anita took in all the sights, noises and strange scents as the canoe smoothly moved along. Soon darkness fell. We could no longer see the muddy river. Here and there lights twinkled on the banks of the river. Sometimes our canoe met other boats with a flashlight or song to warn their presence.
What a glorious sight to finally see a few shining lights from the clinic. The missionary doctor, Elam Stoltzfus and his family were eagerly waiting our arrival. They helped us carry everything from the boat to the clinic grounds, where a generator provided light in the home The hospitality of our hosts was warm and welcoming, making us feel like honored guests. Carmen and Anita made friends with June, the teenage daughter. After talking for a few hours, the girls, Brother High and I were in need of a good night’s sleep. The girls slept on pallets in one of the rooms in the clinic and the rest of us had beds in another building. No electricity or indoor bathrooms at this resort. Not even the strange jungle noises did not keep us up.
The early morning sun soon called us out of bed. Outside, two beautiful pet Macaw parrots were gossiping back and forth. The jungle tree tops were home for many wild Macaws. We had seen parrots perched in the tops of the trees along the river bank.
The damp morning jungle air carried the smell of coffee. The girls were not too sure about this adventure of eating strange food in a strange place with strangers. They thought about skipping breakfast and eating somewhere else. I told them this was their only choice and they should at least make an appearance. At the make shift pavilion, shy and petite native women greeted us as they cooked over a fire. There was sweet coffee in a big black kettle and some jungle bread frying on a large piece of tin. The jungle bread was rationed out and with thankful hearts, we ate. Jungle dining etiquette was our next lesson of the day. While the setting was easy and relaxed, deep respect and gratitude for our cooks was evident. We felt honored to take a seat at the table, be served, and eat the prepared meal. Every guest was expected to be very mannerly. We greeted each other and carried on polite conversation as we ate. It didn’t take long to finish the coffee and bread. My girls and I followed the example of others and said “gracias” as we left.
The forenoon was spent taking a tour of the clinic grounds with Guatemalans visiting the clinic in need of medical aid. We enjoyed a lunch of black beans and jungle coffee. Too soon the sounds of the jungle night life started up again: amid camp fires and fragrant flowers, a piercing scream echoed through the jungle and seemed to land right at the clinic grounds. My girls were quite frightened. They learned this screaming was just the howling monkeys talking to each other. With flashlights, we found our beds, said good night, and listened to the eerie sounds.
Eleven days later when we returned to the U.S. from this mission trip, we thanked the Lord for his many blessings and safekeeping. The plane on this trip logged a total of 15 hours. Considering it was a newly rebuilt engine with only 14 hours logged, we were truly blessed.
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Much more of this experience is written in a small booklet, “Adventures to Central America,” by Merle Headings and two of his daughters, Carmen and Anita. For the entire book by email, write to me at anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com. Or send comments or questions to Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
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What did you learn or experience in a new or different culture? What would you tell others?
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One agency offering a variety of helpful and well planned short and long term mission work is Mennonite Mission Network, an organization I was connected to in various ways over many years. See their work and opportunities in Christian service.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Small Plane Adventure to Central America
Guest column by Merle Headings
Editor’s Note: First of two columns by Merle Headings, who flew missions to Central America for Christian organizations. Columnist Melodie Davis also once flew with Merle on a youth group trip.
Merle Headings photo.
We lived in the Rio Grande valley of Texas for six years in the late 1970’s and early 80’s working with missionaries stationed along the southern border near McAllen, Texas. Four of us pilots regularly flew to Mexico and Central America, each with our own plane. Mine was a red and white Piper Comanche, which could fly 180 miles per hour. Most of the time the planes were filled with people and their belongings, but on this twelve-day trip to Guatemala, there was room to take two of my daughters, Carmen and Anita.
In February 1979, I received a message from a missionary doctor and his clinic, urgently requesting supplies in the deep jungles of northern Guatemala. We located and purchased the items on his list: a new chain saw and parts to fix old chainsaws; tractor parts for their old farm tractor; six different kinds of hand tools; and grocery items they could not get in Guatemala. I began to wonder if all this was going to fit in our plane.
The trip was sponsored by “The Flame of Truth” founders, Melvin and Anna High. Brother High (still ministering today at 90) was invited to speak at a conference being held at a missionary clinic located on the Pasión River.
Anita and Carmen, back seat of plane, 1979. [Photo from Merle Headings]
Early February 28 with the car packed full of supplies, tools, luggage, passports, and flight maps, my wife Verna drove us to the McAllen airport. Our big white bird was ready to be packed, fueled up, and prayed over. While Brother High, Carmen and Anita stuffed the cargo into the four-seat plane, I checked the weather and filed an international flight plan to Guatemala City, with a fuel stop in Veracruz, Mexico. When I got back to the plane, my crew was smiling. The baggage compartment was beyond full. I didn’t dare open that door but I did give it one good bump to make sure it was secure. What didn’t fit in the baggage compartment, went behind and under the back seat. Carmen and Anita would have to share their seats and foot space with the supplies.
The plane was soon in the air and across the Rio Grande river, leaving the U.S. into the wild blue yonder over Old Mexico. With Brother High’s hands soon on the controls, I radioed and activated our flight plan. Nothing looks better to a pilot than a clear day with a nice beach under the wing for the next three hours.
Carmen and Anita were seasoned flyers. Growing up with a pilot father, they had logged many trips. After a few hours, they were beginning to be hungry and in need of a stretch. I said Veracruz was about 40 miles out where we would land soon. After landing, two uniformed men walked toward us and welcomed us to Central America. In broken English, the airport officials asked how long we were staying and if we were U.S. citizens. They looked inside the packed plane, and thankfully did not ask to see the luggage department. After their inspection, I went to get our papers in order and pay for fuel. The girls had gone with Mr. High to order food. Our schedule was tight and we needed to keep moving if we were going to make it all the way to the missionary clinic in the heart of the Guatemala jungle—a four-hour canoe trip on the Pasión River after our long flights.
In short order, we took off. Our flight path soon took us away from the beautiful shore line and over the jungles of southern Mexico. I knew there would be mountains to get over so I climbed to 13,500 feet above the clouds where the mountains were poking up. At two p.m. we landed for another break. Everyone was ready to stretch, breath fresh air, find food, and move on.
While we were getting out of the plane, two Guatemalan officials greeted us. This time they wanted the luggage compartment opened and I thought they were after something. They told me I had to get a cart and bring everything to the terminal. I told them that it was so well packed that it would be very hard to get it all back in and I wasn’t going to bring it in. I went and sat down and looked at a magazine. (I had played the waiting game before in past trips over Central America.) In about ten minutes, the uniformed men came over, gave me my papers and said I was free to go. Thank God! With no time to spare, everyone loaded up with drinks and snacks and again we were in the air headed for the jungles of northern Guatemala. (To be continued.)
“Adventures to Central America,” is a small booklet by Merle Headings and two daughters, Carmen and Anita. For the book by email, write to me at anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com. Or send comments or questions to Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of August 9, 2019
How Children Grow—Especially the Brain
Our two oldest grandsons start real school as kindergartners this August. My mother told me recently she cried when her oldest grandchild, Larry, started school. I was a little surprised.
Perhaps my mom was also recalling her oldest daughter, Nancy, as a very young first grader (age 5, we had no kindergarten), missing the bus and deciding to walk home from school one day. We lived four miles away from town. She bravely started out, all alone, and walked at least a half mile before someone who knew our family distantly, saw her walking, picked her up, and carried her safely home. A small miracle itself.
I don’t think I’ll be weepy, since ours don’t live nearby, but going to school is a monumental step, for sure, even when they’ve been going to daycare and preschool most of their young lives.
When you think about all they’ve managed to “conquer” in five, almost six years since they made their way into the world and our anxious arms, it is nothing short of astonishing. Our grandsons could at first only lay there, look around, and cry if wet, tired, or hungry.
They soon learned to hold up their heads, communicate purposefully with their cries and behavior, sit up, crawl, walk, and talk. And now they are reading, even before starting school. These boys were born in September and November, and as with many other parents, their families decided it was better to start real school at almost 6 rather than almost 5.
So what have YOU or I mastered in the past five years? Anything as remarkable as all that?
From helpless one-day-olds, they can now engage in thoughtful conversation and great questions beyond the endless why’s. They have both certainly been read to for untold hours, and have patient, loving, intelligent parents.
The brain alone grows greatly in the first five years: A website on early childhood development says “At birth, the average baby’s brain is about a quarter of the size of the average adult brain.” Did you know the brain doubles in size that first year and it is nearly 90 percent of its mature size by age five?
Me carefully holding my one day old grandson.
I found this even more fascinating: “A newborn baby has all of the brain cells (neurons) they’ll have for the rest of their life, but it’s the connections between these cells that really make the brain work.” I had known that it is these brain connections that help us move and think as well as communicate: pretty much everything we do. “The early childhood years are crucial for making these connections. At least one million new neural connections (synapses) are made every second, more than at any other time in life.” This is one reason our daughters and their husbands have chosen to not let their children watch much TV or videos. (From https://www.firstthingsfirst.org/early-childhood-matters/brain-development/)
So yes, the mental growth of children by age five is just incredible. I’ve also been thinking about what kind of world their children and their grandchildren will inherit or face: it is almost impossible to fathom the new technologies they will see and use. I certainly never thought of or imagined the many gadgets and tools we take for granted today. In my 16 years of formal education, I went from pencils and chalkboard to a huge computing machine at college (circa 1971) where we made punchcards using “Fortran” to enter data on the machine. Teachers went from old style non-digital overhead projectors using plastic sheets to write on, to video projectors plus whiteboards and smartboards.
The early years of learning are just fascinating, and thrilling to live through again through the eyes and experiences of the grandchildren. Not everyone is so lucky, I know, but most of us have children we can connect with at times through volunteer work, babysitting, neighbors, siblings with children or grandchildren, the nursery at church, or as an aide at school. Or offer foster care. Take time to appreciate, learn from, and enjoy any children in your life!
I’d be happy to send you one or several “Guidelines for Parents” postcards from the historic “Heart to Heart” radio program by Ella May Miller. Send a self-addressed, stamped envelop to Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834, or request by email from anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com .
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
Another Way for week of August 2, 2019
The Rewards of Hosting Cousin Camp
H enjoying watermelon at Joe’s fishing and hunting cabin.
The last in a four-part series on “Learnings from Cousin Camp”
I hope our young grandsons will have memories of cousin camp that stick with them the rest of their lives—if only fuzzy and distant and prodded by pictures. That might be a stretch for H, the three-and-a-half-year-old, but I think most of us have memories from the time we were five so I’m sure S and J will remember some highlights.
And these are some of mine:
- Although young H was scared of the lightning bugs, I allowed J to go out on the porch with me to see the sea of lights in our hayfield. He took his breath in at the sight of the fireflies and said something like ah. I said “Don’t you have fireflies where you live?” He said, “A few, but not like here.”
- H being able to put into words why he was so distraught during the Paddington 2 movie.
- Hearing that S told his mommy he had learned how to lick envelopes to stay shut.
- J’s excitement over eating his very first ice cream cone. His parents had not been able to find gluten free cones where they lived but I found some in my local Food Lion and he was ecstatic. (And yes, the sugar buzz lasted a little while for all three boys.)
- S’s mimicking professional baseball players to a T: in stance, pitcher windup, and catcher squat, even though he mainly plays T-ball.
See light of ceiling solar tube in this photo that J. couldn’t turn off.
- My amusement when J came out of one of our bathrooms that have solar tubes in the ceiling (special tube—non-electric—which magnifies sunlight exponentially, making a very bright light). He said “I tried and tried to turn that light off but it won’t go off!”
- H still loving to cuddle his pet zebra Zsa Zsa on swing or couch.
- S running (almost without looking) in the drive-thru lane at Chick-Fil-A to jump up and embrace his daddy when the week was up.
- J’s laser focus on the Bingo caller as we played real Bingo at a Rockingham County lawn party for the first time.
- Enjoying the older boys’ new interest in family pictures hanging on the walls, asking about “who is this?” and hearing more about them.
And here’s my list of “wish we had done this” or to do next time (check out Shirley Showalter’s post about their experiences).
- Plan a picture day or at least 5 minutes to take some really good pictures of the whole group.
- Have a list of more chores they need to do in order to earn good behavior points and a small prize at the end.
Overall, we learned to know them so much better – their likes and dislikes and the nuances of who was able to laugh at funny stunts in a movie, who got sad, who paid attention to names of roads, who pretends to like snakes.
At the end of the week, I felt depleted, energy sapped. It made me remember those points as a young mom when I felt like jumping in the minivan and driving off, and then after refocusing on my many gifts and blessings, feeling more grateful and in control of my emotions again.
As grandparents, we walk a fine line between letting them enjoy grandparent love and leeway—and holding up parental standards and rules so they don’t become unruly monsters. But this was such a privilege and I hope we have many more highlights and special moments as the years fly by too fast.
What have you enjoyed or learned in your own experiences in hosting grandchildren,
or memories from when you visited your own grandparents.
Can you spot the two extra local “second” cousins here who came over for dinner one night?
For a copy of all four columns on “Learnings from Cousin Camp,” you can write or email me at anotherwaymedia@yahoo.com or Another Way Media, P.O. Box 363, Singers Glen, VA 22834 and I’ll send it to you by mail or email.
Another Way is a column by Melodie Davis, in syndication since 1987. She is the author of nine books. Another Way columns are posted at FindingHarmonyBlog.com a week after newspaper publication.
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